It’s impossible to think about having a second child without thinking about it in the context of the first. Pinguini is not a concept for me existing in a vacuum. I know the love I will have because I have it for Jonah. I also think often about what it means as a parent to have a sibling wish for your child. On a fantasy day, the wish is that my children will be the best of friends, the closest of confidants, more reliable, loyal and true than any other can be for them. I think I know people who have sibling relationships like this. On a nervous day, I think about brothers and sisters who aren’t close, who are nonentities to each other, whose co-existence maybe didn’t matter for very much at all, or worse- created something negative.
And then I think of myself and my own brothers and my sibling wish as a parent becomes more simple, more clear and more attainable: I wish that my children’s lives will better that each other are in them.
Oh and I am still with child. In utero baby is apparently humongously large. Perhaps the biggest baby that ever has gestated in history. So the NHS told me yesterday. Or something. So things may not transpire again the way I would have directed them in the movie about my life. But that movie was lame anyway. I like the documentary version so much more.