I have been so negative about the UK lately. About London. About the British. About the English. Hell, I don’t even know the difference between those four things. It started before Christmas, went through Christmas and lasted after. And it’s really been bothering me. It’s not like me to be down and out about something- or at least something I did voluntarily and excitedly. I was trying to justify it – it’s been a particularly cold winter or our building is a warzone hellhole of construction and we are the only human life forms left living in it trying to last one more day with the fumes and banging and exposed wires… wires I have to negotiate each evening with a large toddler which makes me feel like a much less sexy version of Catherine Zeta-Jones, or was it Rene Russo, double-dutching all those laser beams in that museum in that movie to steal a painting. You know what I’m talking about.
But I don’t know that I can pinpoint one thing. I have decided it’s a three-year itch exacerbated by never ending grey cold and a bunch of other things happening all at once. And I am ready to stop being a hater.
So I have been trying to think more and more of the things I love. And I am dedicated to making a list. Thing #1:
The word “shan’t”.
How can you boo a country where people freely use, in email and even in live conversation, the contraction of “shall not”? In fact, these people use shall in the first place. And then they contract it! I shan’t be a hater anymore.