Myself and two friends coined this Saturday night- a new acronym for texting and IMing. Ready for it?
IJS = “I’m just saying…”
As in: “Look, I think Peter Dinklage is cute. IJS…”
Don’t break my heart and tell me this is already part of tween lexicon.
—
So Saturday night. We got our first stranger baby-sitter for Jonah through a service here. We had a birthday party to go to that was way fun. I came home buzzed and of course it was time for Master Jonah to eat (they honestly refer to him that way in this country- his mail, his prescriptions, etc.). While simultaneously chugging water, making food and scouring the Web for information on breastfeeding while intoxicated, Bryan decided that the most scientific way to assure I would not poison our son would be to give me a quick quiz, which would then be a measure of sobriety. It follows verbatim:
B: When was the Declaration of Independence signed?
Y: Okay, this is a hard one. I am going to guess 1776.
B: You weren’t sure? It’s so easy.
Y: Well I mean there’s like the Magna Carta, the Emancipation Proclamation…so many things.
B: Who invented the cotton gin?
Y: Eli Whitney! BOO. YAH!
B: That was easy. Who invented the assembly line?
Y: [pause] [pause] [pause] OH MY GOSH IT’S HENRY FORD. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. YAHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I rule.
the part where we move to london 
The first was a trick question. I was referring to Eritrea’s Declaration of Independence from Ethiopia. The answer was 1993. You failed.
so, ….did you nurse or no?
The best trick question is “How long was the Hundred Years War?.” It was actually 116 years. Another good one is “Which pope started the Crusades?” Dad used that in a Botticelli game once, and after no one was able to identify the “secret” person, he calmly said “Pope Urban IV.” I think we all threw things at him.
The quick answer to the breastfeeding question is if you are drunk, so is your milk. Milk is made from blood, so your blood alcohol level is reflected in your milk.
Hope that helps for next time!
I did nurse but once I felt pretty sober. I had heard that was a good test Elizabeth… thus the quiz! So far the little man seems okay. But we’ll have to wait and see on the SATs.
As for my father and this Pope business… maybe I will play the game again with him and my secret person will be Miley Cyrus. He will never guess when the clue is: Rapped her Twitter exit.
Really sad that I know this, but they have these litmus test-like strips on which you can test your milk and it changes color to reflect the alcohol content. When I saw them, I thought they were amazing and mentioned them to my then boss who at the time was breast feeding her third child. She was way less excited than me and told me she didn’t want them because then she would actually know…
My friend Kate gave me some of those. That’s the thing though- ignorance is bliss.
oh my goodness. you & bryan are too funny 🙂
technically whitney invented the modern cotton gin. the cotton gin in a simpler form had been invented way before eli came along. have another one Yael.
I should have also mentioned that Bryan asked me the square root of 64. I was tentative in my answer but knew it was 8. So yeah, I should have just kept drinking.
Actually there were others who invented part of the assembly line concept first.
– Jessica Weissman, who has a degree in history of technology and is holding back huge amounts of information on Eli Whitney right now