real housewife of london

A snapshot of the last oh, I don’t know, 72 hours of my life.

So I walk outside the flat yesterday around 5pm to go to an appt. There are paparazzi directly in front of my flat staring at the place three doors down from us. So I cross the street and say to one of them, with a huge smile, ooooh, who are you taking pictures of? Being coy of course because I know Matt Lucas lives there. He of Little Britain fame. And the photog kind of gives me a weird look and says Matt Lucas. And I start chatting him up like, oh Matt Lucas… yeah the guy from Oasis lives on this street too… and didn’t Matt Lucas and his boyfriend get back together… and sometimes his mom is there… and why are you taking pictures of him? And the photog looks at me again strangely and says, um, because his ex hung himself today. Wham. I had no idea. So he says, it’s the cover of every piece of news. Crap, I only checked American news today. So then I say, you guys should leave him alone. And the photog says, oh really? And I say, who am I kidding? I buy your magazines. And I leave.

And it hits me. This is the second time in my life there have been paps on my street to snap shots of a celebrity whose ex just died in a tragic manner. What are the odds? And then when I get home the photog is super sweet and offers to help me with my stroller/buggy but really he wants to know if the buildings have back entrances. As if I am going to help them.

Before all this though I went to pick up the new shower head Bryan had ordered. I walk into the store and the employees go to get my order. And I ask them if my husband cheaped out and bought a crappy head. And they assure me it was a good one. And I am like okay, I hope so- you never know with him. So they hand it to me and I say, did my husband tell you what happened to our old one? Let me tell you. He realized one day the water wasn’t coming out of the little shower spray holes as well so instead of just dipping it in descaler for a few seconds like a normal inhabitant of this country (we have hard water and it is very common to have to use descaler on metal products to get rid of the limescale), he takes tweezers and pokes half the holes in and then puts electrical tape over them. The guy at the store had seen it when Bryan brought it in and started laughing.

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I told Bryan not to do any other DIY projects without running it by me first. It turns out I am the handy one. Which is not saying much. But I realized that making fun of him with two store employees was a small highlight of my day. Is that wrong?

It also turns out our grocery store, with I frequent daily, hates Fox News too. Well done!

In the past few days, two lawyers from my near past have gotten media exposure-one a little, one a lot. Here is my former boss. And here is my former crim pro and evidence professor.

So we recently made the switch from summer to winter clothes. Which sounds embarrassing to even type. Trust me how badly I await the day all my clothes, regardless of seasonal appropriateness, can live side by side together year-round in a humongous closet. So anyway, we were switching clothes and Bryan pulls a cashmere sweater out from a storage basket and it has big holes in it. And I was mesmerized. I had no idea moths really come in and eat sweaters. That always seemed like something that could only happen in the proper breeding ground- like a grandparents’ musty house with crystal bowls filled with Werther’s Originals with a layer of dust on top. And I’m all, um I’m okay, I filled up on breakfast.

Well, back to my full time job. Convincing Jonah to nap.

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7 Comments

Filed under bryan, celebrities, fiscal responsibility, london, photos, politics...sike!, uh oh mommyblogging

7 responses to “real housewife of london

  1. Aunt Barky

    That was one of your best blog entries. Hilarious. I love the taping on the shower head. Sean put tape on our ceiling to fix some cracks. Also I have definitely seen sweaters with holes in them from moths. They really exist.

  2. erica

    shargel is everyone on the news here. he’s representing marc dreier too and was on 60 minutes (is that old news already?)

    i just switched my clothes this weekend too and thought the same thing! wouldn’t it be nice to have a big enough closet to fit everything at the same time!

  3. toshalot

    Or you could move to northern California where you don’t have to switch out clothes bc its pretty much the same temperature all year round.

    Uhm, I agree this blog was totally hilarious. Love Bryan’s DIY and love you for always thinking to take pictures of everything. That was icing on the cake that is the story of Bry’s DIY.

    Moths? I would be mesmerized too. I have never had clothes eaten before either …

    I love Jonah.

  4. sonjey

    I laughed out loud…….seeing that showerhead…Who installed the new one?

  5. NeNe

    Were those the same tweezers PC tried to use on Jonah? You could send the photo to the people who make electrical tape. They probably haven’t thought of that use. And, you realize whose house had a crystal container of dusty Werther’s? ??? Moths. Bad. This blog post. Good. Very, very good.

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